He had a fabulous Lego Star Wars birthday party. The Lego cake took me well into the midnight hour the night before, but the smile that lit up his face when he saw it made it ALL worth it :). Some stress involved always when you have a mix of kids and family like that, but he had fun and we were able to have some relaxing down time and soak it all up at the end of the evening with just Tay (our adopted little sis :)) and the boys and I snuggling and watching "Dora". These moments go by too fast. They need to be savored, and I will never apologize for that. "These are the days," as Natalie Merchant sings... We don't get these moments back~not ever. We might do things a little differently next year. This day is about what makes my kid happy and about my family. That should be able to be respected and adhered to for a few hours, right? ;)
Griff has a very special friend that he adores and she made the day for him. We were blessed to have some Taylor time. It's so adorable to watch how, at such a young age, they know each other so well and are just there for each other. I don't know any other duo of friends at this age that can spend all day together with out fighting or having any 'issues' at all. If they have a disagreement, they work it out till they're both happy. These two just make my heart smile. May we always have friends as true as this! :)
We had our "real" birthday celebration (the actual day :)) together yesterday and went out to eat and Grandma and Aunt Jen brought us both a cake. We played outside and were both just feeling very tired and worn out. G ended up rocking a raging fever (over 103) around ten. He had his well child check up today and shots are rescheduled. All his forms are filled out for daycare and preschool, eye exam, all that good stuff. He has coxsauki and is miserable (just like hand, foot, and mouth--but all in his throat--very painful stuff). Hasn't eaten anything all day--even turned down ice cream and a shake from McDonald's. Fighting with him to drink. Won't touch his Popsicle, but he's entertaining the idea of eating some jello--shaped like a Lego :). Started running a fever myself today and just feel achy and like I have the flu. Hoping to make it through the ten hour work day tomorrow. :( By God's strength, I can! :)
So thankful for so many blessings and another year God has given me to experience them. Trying to find the proper balance between expression and letting things roll. Sometimes I just wish we had the choice to shut the door and not let the yuckiness of life in--but ya gotta deal with it and the fact of the matter is, some of it is just not ever going to change (and that's the most frustrating part)--so you have to grin and bear it and protect your soul. Always protect your soul. I don't want to let it embitter me or change me. And I have to remind myself that although I may not have the choice of avoidance, I DO have a voice and even if it is not respected, listened to, understood, or even regarded, I can use it to demand, to protect, to create this life I want for me and for my family. I'm not afraid anymore. Moreover, I feel like I am 'enough' of a person to deserve it (and my children most certainly are). I also have to trust that God's got this. He is far greater than anything or anyone. My eyes are fixed on him...
If nothing else, this weekend has inspired me to keep on keeping on. There is such a lack of kindness and respect in this world, and if our kids don't even get it--we're in a sorry state of affairs. They mirror what they SEE, not just what we SAY. My kids know that they aren't any better than anyone else. We are all pretty awesome creations of the divine and deserve to be treated as such. "Stupid" is still a put down and a bad word at our house--as well as calling someone a "baby" because they like something different. Uniqueness is prized, not put down. Since when has the "status quo" ever gotten us anywhere...
And, I don't mind loud and crazy. I am the oldest of five children. I've been babysitting and nannying since I was in sixth grade. I have a 4 and 9 year old. I've worked with kids and taught preschool for the past eleven years. I completely get that kids will be both :). I've had a little experience in the field of motherhood and teaching. ;) But I do NOT tolerate disrespect towards me or my children. That is not what being a kid is about or what being a boy is about, for that matter, and isn't something anyone should get used to. I find this to be absolutely insulting to our children--we need higher expectations--we need to model this behavior--they deserve better, they deserve more... I have always said and firmly believe that our children become what we expect of them. I expect more...
Moreover, it is possible. Very possible. My boys can. We have a house full of the kid's friends constantly as we are blessed to live in a neighborhood full of childen (mostly boys) and I love it!!! :) And guess what? THEY can :). My classroom is full of kids that can. That's 24 four and five year olds, folks. So that excuse doesn't work for me--and is even more insulting when it is associated with being a boy. My boys aren't held to any lower standards than I hold girls. Again, I'll plug the book "Real Boys". This world would be in a lot better shape if we as educators and parents all read it :).
I've been on this rant before, and so I will stop. You've been down this road with me :). It's all in how we treat each other, isn't it? More Tylenol for me and hopefully some sleep. So much festering that a scream may be warranted as well (although that would hurt my throat ;)).
Love my boys, love being their momma, and so grateful for the chance and the honor of this journey. That we get to celebrate birthdays, learn lessons, and just find out who we are (as my friend Robin says, "to just be" :)) together. Held together by the hands of God--guiding us all the way.
And I am encouraged by the little lights (getting bigger every year) that my boys are to this world and that they will continue to be. That's God shining through. And although I will continue to mess up and make mistakes for the rest of my and their lives, I know that because they know and have Him (G is still trying to understand the Holy Spirit living in his heart thing--and loves talking about the "ghost" inside his heart ;)) they truly have everything they need.
Love and peace, and many happy, happy birthdays to you all! Goodnight...
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| Grandma and Grandpa Mitchell and cousins (we missed Sierra, Zach, Benji and Sydney) |
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| Grandma Soyer and Grandpa Hill |
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| Finally some rest time... :) |
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