We had a wonderful evening with friends, such great food and some wine after another rough week, and the boys played long into the night with their buddies Jack and Nate while we grown ups got to sit and talk. Heaven! Speaking of, Griffyn experienced his own nirvana and had a toy gun in his hand for most of the evening (I may have to succumb--the kid is kind of obsessed with them--"dust toy ones, mom, NOT weal ones!" as he mentions in his prayers each and every night as a way to appease me ;)) and he and Jack honed their WWE skills while Max and Nate played football till red in the face outside and then had some fun making "movies" on the Ipad. It always takes a bit to corral the boys to the van when they're having so much fun, but I think we were home by midnight ;). As always, thanks to T and J for making us feel so at home!
Jammies, teeth, and even books were read (I tried not to rush through them but did deter a second reading of "Where The Wild Things Are")--and they went to bed very easily. Max was excited for his early wake up call with Daddy as he went with Marty to Iowa City today to watch the Hawks play UNI. Poor Max got about as much sleep as I did as Griffyn started screaming and having nightmares around 2 a.m. Isn't that when the world always falls apart? 2 a.m.? ;) It's been a few weeks of this now...
I don't know what it is about daddies, or maybe it's just my husband, that they are always completely deaf to the sounds of their children screaming in the middle of the night. So, it's me that gets up. Marty continued to snore on as the blurry, dark image of my huge boy child loomed in front of me (which was startling and nightmarish enough for me to awaken to--enough of my nightmares are made up of that stuff)--"Griffyn's crying and yelling and he won't stop, Mom".
So we trudge to the boy's room and there's G, thrashing about and screaming, "NO! DOE AWAY!!!"
"Be careful, Mom, when I tried to hug him, he punched me. So just be careful please, Mom." Max gave me a big hug and heaved that big boy body back up to the top bunk. Ahhhhh, night terrors. "I'll be okay, honey. Thanks for coming and getting me, and I'm sorry I didn't hear." I usually do--but must have just crashed after a week of no sleep.
Trying to calm the storm that was G, rubbing his back, whispering to him that mommy was here and everything was okay as he rolled from side to side, not awake but not sleeping either. Eventually he settled down and his breathing became soft and rhythmic again. Kisses and plodded on down the hallway to rejoin my snoring husband who's sleep wasn't interrupted in the least. I had just closed my eyes when Max was back, "Um, Mom, sorry but Griffyn says he needs you." And all I could think about was how ridiculously tired Max was going to be in a few hours. Hopefully he could get some sleep on the drive to IC...
There sat Griff--a mad, dejected mess. All four pillow pets thrown off his bed, blankets all askew, and his beloved horses and "feebras" peppered all over the place. "I dust need you, Momma. I tan't det the bad fings outta my head!!! Why did you leeb me?!?"
"What bad things, honey?" I asked, skipping over the abandonment issue (best mom EVER! ;)). "I don't wanna even FINK about it, Momma, tause den it dets BACK in my head!" Okay, understood, picked him up and cuddled. "I need to sweep wif you, Mommy, tause den I won't be cared." and then a soft voice from Max comes, "Can I just sleep by you on the floor?". By now, it's after 3 a.m. and I really, really just want to close my eyes and could sleep on a pile of rocks and barbed wire at this point--so two boys and one mommy make the trek back to Mommy and Daddy's room--where Daddy is STILL snoring, blissfully unaware of our adventures.
I know this phase will pass for Griffyn. Max went through it too--and it's usually worse when we're so busy and he doesn't get enough sleep. And no matter what time G goes to bed, he always gets up early. He's just got way too much to do. He's a light sleeper--and despite an air purifier, two night lights and his light up pillow pet--his imagination is scarier to him than anything he's ever seen or any story he's ever heard. Most of the time he can't remember what his bad dream was about, although I can sometimes tell by whatever he's yelling. It's usually about a friend hurting him or someone he loves getting hurt. He's saved his precious baby Grace from many ferocious beasts!
We WILL be taking a nap today. This week has kicked my b-u-t-t (and pretty much everything else). Never have been a good sleeper, but after getting woken up so many times, I just can't fall back asleep anymore. And who has the luxury of sleeping in when there's work and preschool to get to? And this husband of mine has been so busy with cross country meets and teaching that it's all me at the end of the day too--and with football--the weekends are, you guessed it, me too. So Griff and I will be having a lounge around, easy day today (got that, G?) :). We may leave the house to explore our beloved bike path, but that's it. This momma is hunkering down... ;)
So thankful for the time to be home and always love every minute I get to spend with these boys! Always being tired is just part of being a mommy to these two lovies, and I know so many of us are in the same boat. There really is no such thing as balance at this point--although I often can give myself the illusion of such a thing--it's really day by day, and moment by blessed moment--and finding the thankfulness and joy in it all--and that is perfectly fine with me. I KNOW I will miss this all and it will go by all too fast...
With family walks and much more reading and Bible study time, we are doing a better job of staying connected as a family--and that's the most important thing to me right now. I don't want to lose out on that precious communication with Max (or G, but Max's world is a bit more complicated to navigate than G's at the moment so it takes a bit more of that communication ;)). This ten year old terrain is a whole new ball game (HA!) for me. He's a little grown up and little kid all smushed into one anxious, loving, soft hearted, germ obsessed, worrisome, absent minded (poor kid takes after me--but with all that stuff going on in his head, something has to give), sports loving, art loving (creating comic books is his new thing), prayerful, big yet little being--and I need to be mindful of his world and what he's going through and the struggles he faces. And I need to be always listening and just taking the time to be there--be present. Things come out at the oddest times. And just making those times together available is so important to me. Guess I'm just one of those really weird mommy's that covets and really enjoys and needs to spend time with her kids :). So no, he won't be rushing off to a friends house the minute we pull into the drive way after I haven't seen them all blessed day! And the fact that Max would rather spend time home than always be running off and playing with his buddies (although he enjoys that too) makes me realize that HE is needing and wanting this time also. And he's beginning to navigate those waters of friendship and family and I'm loving that he is still loving to have his Mom time. And I'm sure he will enjoy his Dad time today at Kinnick and hoping the Hawks can catch a ball or two ;)...
I digress... which you are all used to... :)
More caffeine please, and safe travels to everyone headed to games near and far and may your team win. I plan on nursing a headache on the couch--and may even endure an episode of Sponge Bob or two to get said couch time. What a week! I keep saying that, don't I? ;)
Peace, love and happy weekend to all! Hope there are cozy blankets, pillows, and naps in your futures--or at least enough coffee to make it through the day with your eyes open :)!
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