"Kiss your children goodnight, even if they are already asleep." H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
Marty has yet another track meet tonight. Brrrrrr! Poor kids (and husband)! He had one last night too. He also worked Cross Mark and track, baseball practices, pictures, and meetings have pretty much given us a solid ten minutes of conversation this week. Good thing we caught up this past Sunday from 11p.m. to midnight :). I miss my husband... I guess that can be seen as a positive thing :)...
Life is ridiculously crazy. I know it's like that for most of us. Now with G starting his first stint at organized sports, I know it will be even crazier--but also that this will be an "easy" year compared to when Griff starts little league next year. If only we didn't have to work and pay bills, clean our homes, do laundry, cook, make sure our kids our clean, get their homework done... all that good stuff--maybe we'd have some "free" time. That's why I don't sleep ;).
Having some tea (my favorite black vanilla bean), enjoying listening to the sounds of Max and Griffyn playing hoop shoot upstairs, and frozen (yes, tres gourmet) pizzas are in the oven. I always feel a little better when I put extra Kraft cheese and some veggies on them--if you put LOTS of Kraft shredded cheddar on top of the veggies, they can't see them ;). Makes me feel like they are a little more "home made" and a smidgen more healthy :). Dryer is going, and Max set the table (complete with his "fancy" triangle version of folded napkin). We just need Daddy (who is freezing out in this cold, wet, dreary weather with over 70 junior high kids--sounds like good times to me ;)). He'll be back too late again tonight for hugs and kisses and prayers. Max always prays for Daddy to come home safely--and Griff always prays that "dey wonned". :)
Talking to my girl friends yesterday at work, we were all commiserating on our lack of sleep and crazy schedules. Everyone is just plain out spent. I feel like we are always rushing from one thing to the next--then hurrying to get food shoved in the boy's mouths before practices/games, baths, tie up loose ends for the next day, and hurrying the kids to bed. If we took our time and went at a relaxing pace, the Mitchell boy's bedtime would be somewhere around 11 p.m. The boys need their sleep too. So we rush and rush and rush then demand their bodies relax and drift off to sleep~no short of NOW! Weird that it doesn't work ;)...
Griff loves to be sung to sleep. After each song he says, "Anudder one, mommy", till he drifts of to sleep and all I hear is breathing. He want me to lay with him and hold him during these mini performances for one. Last night, I had time for three and felt so terrible. 'Hurry up and fall asleep, will ya?', was all I was thinking. Nice and relaxing for a three year old after his busy day, right? 'Mommy has to get stuff done!', my mind was screaming inside. Took a few deep breaths and reminded myself that these "sing me to sleep, Mommy" days will be over soon... So I sang some more, till he couldn't keep his eyes open any longer...
We will never have enough time. Just gotta face that. I won't be getting sleep for awhile. Just not in the cards right now. My ten hour work days leave little left for the boys--and the list of things that have to be done after school take up the few hours that are left of my day. I am very thankful to have two days (I get my 30 hours done in three days) a week with G where we can just be together--amidst keeping the house dusted, vacuumed, and the bathrooms cleaned :). There's always laundry. That's just a given :). And I know how blessed I am. My "off" days have been spent with sick kids these past few months, so I'm looking forward to some sunshiny, play outside all day and get all dirty, bike path adventure, and long pool days soon. Most of the time, I'm so tired from the work days before, that I'm not the resounding ball of energy I want to be, but we push ahead. Sunshine always helps...
I try to be as organized as possible to "save" time, but inevitably something is forgotten or left out. Our calender is a scribbled, marked up mess--it started out being color coded, but forget about it. If I don't write it down NOW, I'll forget--and the correct color of pen isn't always readily available. Sometimes I wish for easier days, more relaxed and unscheduled days and weekends and I worry about Max. Is two baseball teams too much? I remember running around all day in bare feet catching grasshoppers, making dandelion "butter" on my skin, and swinging on the swing set at our apartment complex till I thought I'd puke--no schedule, no hurry up, no do this now so we can rush and do this... I want that for my kids. But, it's a whole different world now. Children become little multi tasking "mini" adults far too fast. I think we tend to forget just how "little" they really are... And this childhood thing? They only get it once. They have the rest of their lives to be over extended, busy, stressed out, and frazzled adults, right? I mentally battle this and just keep telling myself--"as long as he's having fun"...
So, I get what I can from these fast and furious moments and snuggle, hug, and kiss them up as much as possible. Pretty soon they'll be two grown up boys walking around my house that really don't care to be sung to, for kisses, story time, or telling me about their day (in G's case, it's always who he played with and who was naughty to him--with Max it's usually how he did on a test and what games they played at recess). This will all be a memory soon, and they won't need me nearly as much. So I will ENJOY this never being able to catch my breath as much as possible :).
Max told me on the way home from school today that he and his friend, Liberty, are creating a book series together about a Wildcat with superpowers. He is writing a few more books over the weekend and she will be finishing up the first two to complete "the series". I love this. I remember how much I loved to write when I was "little" (and still do) and it's so awesome that he is still into this (as he began "journaling" when he was four) and is now sharing and enriching that experience with a friend. He then told me, "and mom, she said I HAVE to call her when I'm finished." :). Nope, my third grader is STILL too young to be calling girls. Sorry, Liberty. This will have to strictly be a school activity ;). And G is still spending his days traipsing around Colleen's with his friend, Taylor, and still arguing between the boys about who gets to marry her ;). As I type this, I now realize that although the boys are heavily involved in sports and dirt--their lives seem to be becoming slowly infiltrated by girls. Hmmmmmmm, I guess this is just a sign of things to come ;). Not THAT is something I am truly not ready for!!!
Hold your little ones (even those big almost ten year olds :)) a little closer, snuggle a little longer, read a few more stories, and sing a few more songs... Between the tired and the busy and the "I just want to pass out", enjoy--and enjoy some more. I know I will really, really miss this some day.
Maybe even all the crazy business...
Peace and love...
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